Thursday, May 9, 2013

League Post: Deserted Island!

So it's League of Extraordinary Bloggers' time once again! This time around, Brian got a bit more wordy with the topic. I actually love the simpler, more-open-to-interpretation one or two word topics, don't mistake me. But this one is very... VERY... specific.

league deserted island


I'm going to set the stage first. I've been stranded for 10 years on a deserted island. I was obviously sailing around the world on my own, a dashing millionaire with a private, one-man schooner. I prepared by loading my small vessel with a hold full of one food-item, one film to watch for 10 full years, one game to play all that time, and one person to spend all that time with... plucks from the halls of pop-culture history. Then some sort of untoward happenstance (hurricane, tsunami, pirates (and not the fun kind), falling space-wreckage, sea-monster, what-have-you...) lands my sorry ass on a deserted island.


So let's break this down.

1) I get to take one food item (in a never-ending supply). What would it be?

It took me only a minute to think this one through. Since it's MY choice, and "never-ending supply" sort of implies that LOGIC need not apply... I choose:



STEAK MUTHAF**KA!!!

Of course, I'm going to salvage a grill from the schooner and grill that shit up right. EVERY DAY FOR TEN YEARS (And because I have a never-ending supply I am not going to worry about keeping it fresh). And this isn't some cheap cut. We're talking the good stuff. A thick... juicy porterhouse. Yes... I know, after 10 years, I might get sick of porterhouse steaks... but I don't care. It's what I want. 

2) I get to take along one movie (And I'm assuming I have some way of watching it over and over again for 10 years without having to just stare at the case...). What would it be?

My favorite movie of all time? One that I would want to watch time and time again for 10 years worth of viewings? Easy. 


BUBBA HO-TEP MUTHA-F**KA!!!

I. Love. This. Film. From the main character, Sebastian Haff, to the ridiculous fight scene with a scarab beetle, to a show-down between a senior citizen in a Lone Ranger costume and a Mummy in... well pretty damn close to the same duds, to the sense of loss the viewer feels when watching a black man who thinks he is John F. Kennedy talking to a man who may-or-may-not actually be Elvis Presley as they discuss the wrongs they have perpetrated against their imagined (or maybe not imagined...) children... This film is incredible. It's a cross breed of a film, with genuine drama and human emotion and goofy comedy hi-jinks wrapped up in a shlocky, b-movie horror package.

3) I get to bring along one game. What one will I choose? 

Mwuah-ha-ha!!! I've been playing it pretty by-the-rules so far, and this will be the first time I kind-of-sort-of cheat... But it says ONE GAME. 



AD&D MUTHA-F**KA!!!

Yes. That's right. I am bringing along the ENTIRE set of AD&D books, supplements, and compatible products... which encompasses all books and magazines put out by all companies, official TSR products or not. I will be fair and limit it to 2nd Edition compatible books (but this does NOT eliminate the handful of books from the 1st edition or 2.5 edition that are fully functional in a 2nd edition game). I'm going full-on wish-fulfillment here. This would include plenty of dice, paper, character sheets, and graph paper for making maps as well. It's my fantasy island. It's ALL ONE GAME DAMMIT. 

So Ravenloft, Dark Sun, Dragonlance, Player's Option, Grimtooth's Traps, Spelljammer... ALL OF IT is on the island (I sort of imagine in a bunch of trunks similar to the ones from "Joe vs. the Volcano" so they're kept nice and dry). 

4) I get to bring one character from pop culture along... Who would it be?

Well... I can't play AD&D with just one person can I? So I'm killing a few dozen birds with one mutant stone here:


MULTIPLE MAN MUTHA-F**KA!!!

That's right folks, I'm bringing Jamie Madrox, The Multiple Man with me! He is and always has been one of my absolute favorite X-characters. I love the nature of his power, I love that when he's by himself... he's never alone. I would never be lacking for extra players for AD&D... we'd always have a full work-force for whatever needed doing around the island... and if it gets too crowded (or if they start eating up too much of my never-ending supply of steak...), he can just reabsorb his dupes to make space. 

Would I get tired of having steak dinners while playing AD&D between viewings of Bubba Ho-Tep with one guy who can become hundreds of guys? Maybe. But I'd have a whole lot of fun for the first year or so.

Who and what would the rest of the League be stranded with? (I'm dispensing with the clever references to the contents of each site just for this week because the topic is so specific...) 







Okay that's it for me tonight kids! I'll be back soon with some more Geeky Goodwill Goodies! Until then, Happy Hunting!

10 comments:

  1. OMG no way! Bubba Ho-Tep! I forgot about that movie! And what a smart idea to have Jamie Madrox as your guest on the deserted island! That is brilliant!

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  2. Multiple Man is pure genius... Now, if only there was a lady version...

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    1. I'm sure there is somewhere. I think another interesting idea would be Mastermind (or Lady Mastermind) because then you'd never get bored living on the deserted island, and s/he could make the steak appear and taste like any other food. The Mastermind powers were full-sensory illusions.

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  3. That's alotta steak! I dig it!

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    1. I think I'd really have to make myself love it.

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  4. Love the D&D choice, but I prefer pathfinder myself.

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    1. I would also have accepted the entire line of Palladium roleplaying games and supplements. The Entire White Wolf World of Darkness line would have been a good third choice for me.

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  5. Replies
    1. I always them too. I'm smelling what you're stepping in.

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